164. What Rejection Has Taught Me

Today I received an email stating that I did not receive a grant. The grant was for a Young Author's Club that I wanted to start for the following school year. I wasn't too heartbroken over this news. In fact, I wasn't heartbroken at all. I didn't trivialize the rejection, either. I just accepted it and moved on.  

I learned at a young age about what it meant to experience rejection. Whether it was from my peers, relationships, organizations, schools, programs, jobs, whatever, I can honestly say that I'm glad I experienced the feelings of rejection.

What I learned from rejections:

  • Other human beings do not have the final say so in your life about YOUR OWN destiny. You decide. If you want to do something great in your life, you don't have to wait for someone to accept you into their space to make that happen. You find a way to make it happen.


  • Rejections are often blessings in disguise. I thank the Lord for keeping me from certain relationships, going to certain schools, being employed with certain jobs, etc. Sometimes we may believe we are signing up for a wonderful situation, and later we find out that it doesn't match our personality, our morals, our values, our spirit.


  • When it comes to not being accepted by people, you have to remind yourself that it's not what people say about you, but what you say about yourself. Who will you believe? You don't need to bend over backwards to please a flawed human being with their own set of issues.


  • Life goes on after being rejected. I don't care how bad the rejection letter, response, or experience is, the world will continue to turn. Life will move on. Don't dwell on negative thoughts and get caught up in your emotions over one aspect of life. Learn from it and move on. 


  • Rejection teaches you to be creative. So you didn't get the money for that grant. You didn't get all the materials for your project. The doors slammed in your face. Well, you know what? You can create your own door to walk through. You can find your own materials and be creative with the resources you have. Rejection doesn't mean the end of your dreams!


  • A no doesn't always means no permanently. Sometimes it can mean, you're not ready, you're not there yet, you still have some training to do, it's not for me but for someone else, etc. Don't take no as a personal jab. It's called constructive criticism.


  • Last, but certainly not least, rejection has taught me to seek God first. I know this is ironic, being that this is the last bullets on the list, but seriously SEEK GOD FIRST. Sometimes we run to everyone else when we have a need, unfulfilled desire, dilemma, or something else. Sometimes God is telling us to slow down, seek him first, and listen to his instruction in the still voice. You will never feel rejected when you have the creator of the universe in your corner. It's just not possible. 

I said all of this to say that rejection doesn't have to destroy us. I know that it threatened to destroy me a time or two in the past, but I've learned how to see every single one of those experiences as a training ground for life. What's also been a good thing is that I really believe it's prepared me for my future entrepreneurial career as a writer.

Everyone's perspective won't mirror mine, and I have to understand that everyone won't enjoy everything I do. And you know what? That's okay. The world will still turn and I will continue to write. 

Don't allow rejection to break you; allow it to make you. Be empowered by those who dropped you or slammed the door in your face, for it won't be long before the right door opens and lead you straight into your destiny.